Obedience plays a role in the life of all Christians. Why is this? It is because nobody should trust only in their own ideas, plans, thoughts, or discernment. For instance, St. Basil the Great taught, “The one who counsels himself, fights himself.” This is especially true in the spiritual life, as imagination, misunderstanding of spiritual writers, or error born of “prelest,” (spiritual delusion) can cause significant problems even for the truly devout. Presuming the person we consult is wise and godly, s/he can often identify misunderstandings, help clarify motives, or offer considerations that may not have occurred to us. No worthwhile spiritual guide( secular, clerical, or monastic) should ever seek to take away the free will of someone who consults him or her; rather, s/he should seek to shine a light on the sometimes dark and twisting path of our journey into salvation.
Benedictine Oblates of Ladyminster promise, “Obedience to the Will of God.” When one becomes an oblate, one commits to contextualize obedience to the Will of God by accepting that one’s own perception of God’s Will, with regard to the duties of an oblate, is to be confirmed or corrected by the text of the Holy Rule and by appropriate consul-tation with the Abbot of the oblate’s monastery.
“When it comes to obeying the Rule and the Abbot, the obedience of an oblate is not of the same degree as that of a monk. Monks vow to surrender acting according to their own will (but not their conscience) for the sake of their soul and in consideration of their brethren.
For oblates, the Abbot’s authority extends to their “personal prayer rule,” the practice of the Divine Office, and other areas specifically agreed between the oblate and the Abbot. In certain other areas, such as changing confessors, changing parishes, or changing jobs (all of which can have an impact on one’s duties as an oblate), it is useful, even recommended, to consult with the Abbot. He may or may not recommend or “bless” such actions, but he has no authority to coerce a decision one way or another. The Abbot may not tell oblates whom they should marry, what car to buy, or advise contrary to the godly advice of their confessor or interfere with the life of their parish.
Obedience is not meant to be a tyranny or a way to control people but, instead, a virtue that offers what we might call “spiritual checks and balances,” in the form of encouragement, caution, counsel, and dispassionate perspective.